Beatrijs
(1986)–Anoniem Beatrijs– Auteursrechtelijk beschermd
[pagina 53]
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[pagina 54]
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aant.IN writing verse is
little gain. People
tell me I should refrain
From wasting thus my
weary mind.
Yet, for the flower of womankind,
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Who mother was and maid remained,
I have begun a miracle quaint,
Which God, no doubt, showed to our luck
In honor of Mary, who gave Him suck.
It's of a nun I will begin
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A tale. God grant me skill to spin
The thread aright and steer its trend
To the moral pointed at the end,
And to tell it truthfully
As brother Gilbert told it me.
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He was a cloistered Williamite.
He found it in his books one night.
He was an aged, day-worn man.
The nun of whom my tale began
Had fine manners and courtesy.
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Ye would not find one easily,
Nowadays, who was her peer
In gracious demeanor and in cheer.
For me to praise her body were
A thing improper. I would not dare
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Give a description of her beauty.
But I will tell what kind of duty
In the convent was assigned to her
Where she wore habit for many a year.
Sacristan was she there.
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I tell no lies, I would not dare.
Her work she would never neglect or slight,
Neither by day nor by night.
She did her chores on time and well.
In church she used to toll the bell,
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To light the altar and adorn,
aant.And wake the whole convent in the morn.
This damsel was not without
Love, who worketh all throughout
The world wondrous happenings,
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Whence at times sorrow springs,
Shame, wrath, misery,
Sometimes joy and ecstasy.
Love turns wiseman into fool,
So that he knows not how to rule
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Himself, whether he like it or not.
A man who in love's power is caught
Knows not whether his profit be
In silence or in rhetory.
None goes free, by Love subdued,
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Unless Love's in a relenting mood.
Love makes a man generous with his pelf
Who would rather keep it for himself,
If not Love prompt him thereto.
Others again are so staunch and true
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That all they own, whatever it be,
Is common between them, by Love's decree,
Happiness, gladness, need.
Such love I call true indeed.
I could not tell fully, though,
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What happiness and mishap flow
Out of Love's running brook.
Therefore, I pray you, don't rebuke
The nun because she could not escape
Love, who held her in his grip.
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For the devil will always plot
To tempt man, and ceases not,
Day and night, early and late,
To do his worst, and lies in wait
With wicked wiles. He did begin
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To tempt the nun with carnal sin,
That she thought she would die.
God she prayed insistently
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aant.That through His grace He comfort her.
She said, ‘I am burdened with heavier
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Load of love than I can bear.
He knows Whose eye is everywhere,
For nothing is hidden from His gaze.
Through love I am wandering in a maze.
Another life I must start,
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And this habit I must discard.’
Now hear what after this occurred.
To that yeoman she sent word
For love of whom she pined away.
In humble words she wrote, ‘I pray,
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Beloved, come soon to me.
I promise it will profit thee.’
She sent her letter by messenger.
The youth who was so dear to her
Read what his beloved wrote.
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He was glad with her note
And hastened to her as he was told.
Since they were twelve years old
Those two had been in love's throes,
That they suffered many woes.
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He rode, as fast as he could,
To where the nun's convent stood.
In front of the little window frame
He sat and waited till she came
Whom he would see and speak withal.
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She tarried not, but soon did call
On him at the window, which with bars
Of iron crosswise covered was,
Just like a checkerboard.
Many were the sighs they poured,
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He from without, she from within,
Both from strong love suffering.
Thus they sat for a century.
It were impossible for me
To say how oft they blushed and paled.
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aant.‘Woe me, woe me,’ she quailed,
‘Dearly beloved, what to do?
Speak to me a word or two,
Such as will comfort me.
I want to be consoled by thee.
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Love's arrow has pierced my heart.
The wound it made I feel it smart.
I'll never be glad and free from pain
Until thou'st pulled it out again.’
He answered her tenderly,
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‘Dearest, thou knowest well that we
Have loved each other many a year,
But in all that time we ne'er
Had so much freedom between us twain
That I could kiss and be kissed again.
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May God curse Dame Venus
Who put this love into us,
Curse the goddess who was cause
That two such beautiful flowers
Fade and wither utterly.
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I wish I could persuade thee
To lay this nun's habit aside
And set a day for me to abide
On which I may come and take thee away.
I would prepare for that day
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Good clothes of precious wool,
Lined with fur, and a full
Outfit of mantle, coat and skirt.
Whatever happens, I won't desert
Thee ever, but share with thee
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Good and bad, whatever it be.
Thereto I pledge thee my faith.’
‘Beloved,’ she answereth,
‘I accept it readily,
And will go so far with thee
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That none in the convent ever will know
To what place we did go.
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aant.Come a week from today
And, until I find a way
To leave, in the garden wait for me,
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Under the wild rose tree.
I shall come, wait outside,
And I will become thy bride
To go whither thou choose with thee.
Unless sickness hinder me
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Or obstacles I can't remove,
I shall certainly come, dear love,
And I beg thee earnestly
That thou comest there to me.’
Each gave other his consent.
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He took his leave of her and went
Where he left his horse tied.
He mounted in the saddle and hied
On his way at a fast trot
Toward the town. He banished not
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His beloved from his thought.
The next day he went and bought
Woven cloth, scarlet and blue,
Which he ordered made into
A good-sized mantle and cape,
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A coat and skirt to fit her shape,
All lined fashionably.
Better fur one never did see
Worn under women's clothes.
It was praised by all those
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Who saw it. He also bought for her
A girdle with knife and almoner,
A diadem, a ring of gold,
And jewelry manifold.
He asked for all the finery
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Which a bride is glad to see.
Five hundred pound he took along,
And one day, at even song,
He left the town secretly.
aant.That precious outfit carried he
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Firmly packed upon his horse,
And to the convent took his course.
He sat down where the lass
Told him, in the garden grass
Till the time he should spy her,
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Underneath the wild brier.
More of him I will not tell,
But tell you of this damosel.
She sounded matins before midnight.
Through love she was in a sore plight.
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After matins had been sung
Both by old and by young,
All who were cloistered there,
And when all the sisters were
Asleep again and still as stone,
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She remained in the choir alone,
And she read her prayers o'er
As she had often done before.
She knelt down before the altar,
And said, while fear made her falter,
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‘Dear Lord, name so sweet,
Now it is no longer meet
That my body shall remain
In this habit. Man hides in vain
His inmost heart and being from Thee.
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I've prayed and fasted, woe is me,
And have taken chastisement.
But all in vain I repent.
Love has overpowered me.
The world's servant I must be.
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As truly as Thou, o dear Lord,
Between two thieves wert hanged and gored
And tormented upon the cross
And recalledst Lazarus
Back from death in the tomb,
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So truly mayst Thou know my doom
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aant.I must succumb to mortal sin
And forgive my trespassing.’
She left the choir and went to a niche
That held an image, in front of which
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She knelt down and spoke her prayer
To our Lady standing there.
She cried, ‘Mary!’ unafraid,
‘Night and day to Thee I've prayed
And pitifully confessed my dread.
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It has availed me not a shred.
I'll altogether go insane,
If in this habit I remain.’
She doffed the veil that she wore
Upon our Lady's altar floor.
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Thereafter she took off her shoes.
Hear what course she now pursues:
In front of Mary's image she
Hung the keys of the sacristy.
I'll tell you what her reasons were
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For hanging the bunch of keys just there.
At prime they'd miss the keys, she thought,
And easily find them in that spot.
For it is proper for everyone
To raise her eyes and look upon
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Mary's image in coming nigh
And whisper ‘Ave’ passing by,
‘Ave Maria’. This was the thought
Which made her leave them in that spot.
She left, since she could stay no more.
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A hairy shirt was all she wore.
To a postern door she knew the way,
Which she unlocked without delay,
And went out stealthily,
Not making any sound, till she
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Entered the garden full of fear.
The yeoman saw her appear
And said, ‘Dearest, don't be afraid,
aant.It is thy friend comes to thine aid.’
When those two together came,
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She began to blush with shame.
For there she stood with nothing on
But a shirt, and nothing upon
Her head and feet. ‘My dear,’ said he,
‘Thy beautiful body deserves to be
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Dressed in good, beautiful clothes.
Blame me not for the ones I chose.
Come and I will give them thee.’
They went under the wild rose tree,
And all of which she was in need
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He gave her, more than enough indeed.
Two suits he gave to her.
Blue was the one she put on there,
Cut so as to make it fit.
He looked at her wearing it
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And said with a smile, ‘Sky-blue, I'd say,
Suits thee better than convent grey.’
She put on stockings he did choose
And a pair of cordwain leather shoes,
Which became her twice as well
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As the sandals she left in her cell.
A coverchef which he had brought
He gave her there. He had it wrought
Of snow-white silk. She put it on
And pressed a tender kiss upon
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The yeoman's mouth. It seemed to him,
As she stood there fresh and trim,
That the day began to dawn.
He went to his horse across the lawn
And into the saddle lifted her
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In front of him, and gave the spur.
They rode till night began to fail
And no one seemed to be on their trail.
Then in the east the morning rose.
She said, ‘God, comfort of all those
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aant.Who are in need, preserve us twain.
I see the day turn bright again.
Hadn't we absconded, I and thou,
I should be sounding prime just now,
As I every day have done
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In the convent where I was nun.
I fear me, I shall rue this flight.
The world's faith is but slight.
Yet towards the world I've turned my feet.
The world resembles the crafty cheat
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Of a chapman who falsely sold
Tinsel rings for rings of gold.’
What art thou saying, love,’ said he.
Wheresoever we may go,
‘May God lay his curse on me
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If I should leave thee evermo.
No need so great that severeth
Us twain, unless it be bitter death.
How canst thou have a doubt of me?
Did I ever prove to thee
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False or wicked of design?
Since I first chose thee for mine,
There was no other for whom I'd care,
Although an empress she were.
Even if I worthy of her should be,
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I wouldn't for her, my dear, leave thee.
Love, believe me thereto bound.
I carry with me five hundred pound
Of pure silver white of sheen.
Thou shalt be mistress of that, my queen.
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Though we journey to lands unknown,
There won't be need for us to pawn
These seven years a single thing.’
Thus came they, easily cantering,
In the morning, to a wood.
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The birds were in a festive mood.
They made music so loud
aant.That one heard it round about.
Each sang as his nature him told.
One saw there beautiful flowers unfold
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Their petals in the green moss bed.
Lovely they looked and fragrance spread.
Clear and radiant was the air.
Many tall trees stood there,
Each lifting a luscious crown.
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He looked at that lovely one
To whom he bore a steadfast love.
He said, ‘Dearest, if thou approve,
We should dismount and pluck a flower.
This is a pleasant place and hour.
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Come and let us play love's game.’
She spoke, ‘What sayest thou, for shame
Should I lie down in the wood
Like women who earn a livelihood
With their body boorishly?
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Then were there little shame in me.
This wouldn't have come into thy mind
Wert thou not of boorish kind.
I have reason to be sad.
May God curse thee for such bad
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Intentions. Speak of something else.
Listen to the birds in glens and dells,
How they carol and make glee.
Their music will pass the time for thee.
When I am naked in a bed,
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Neatly made with sheets and spread,
Then mayst thou do thy will with me,
To whatever thy heart prompteth thee.
It maketh me sad and void of cheer
That thou didst propose it here.’
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Hear, do not be wroth,’ said he.
‘It was Dame Venus who prompted me.
May God give me shame and pain
If ever I mention it again.’
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aant.She said, ‘I will forgive thee then.
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Thou art my comfort above all men
Who under heaven live and thrive.
If handsome Absalom were alive
And I could have certainty
Of living with him in luxury
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And peace for a thousand year,
I would still have rather thee, my dear.
Darling, I am in love with thee
So much that it were blasphemy
To say I could forget thy face.
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If God should give to me a place
In heaven and thine were here below,
I would come to thee even so.
O God, do not punish me
For speaking such profanity.
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The least of joys in heaven above
Is greater than all the joys of love.
So perfect is the least of them
That the soul knoweth no other aim
Than to love God endlessly.
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All life on earth is misery.
It is indeed not worth a hair
Compared to the least that happens there.
Those are wise who strive for heaven.
I know, although myself am driven
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To an erring life of sinful joy,
For the sake of thee, dear handsome boy.’
Thus they bandied talk at will.
They rode through valley and over hill.
I cannot give account of all
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That between them did befall.
Thus they rode up and down
Till they came unto a town
In a valley on a pleasant site.
There they found so much delight
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That they remained there seven years,
aant.Living in luxury and ease
And indulging in carnal joys.
They begot two little boys.
When the seven years came to an end,
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They had no money left to spend.
They had to live on what they sold
Of their belongings manifold,
Horses, clothes, finery,
At half the price it ought to be.
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But the proceeds soon were spent.
Then they knew not how to fend
For themselves. She was no good
At spinning for a livelihood.
At that time things were dear
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In the land, food, wine, and beer,
And everything one might consume.
Hence their hearts were full of gloom.
They would rather have been dead
Than have begged for their bread.
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Poverty cut these two apart,
Though it made them sad at heart.
He was the first to be untrue.
He left her there in bitter rue,
And returned where he lived before.
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She did not see him ever more.
Two children remained with her.
One never saw any lovelier.
She said: ‘Now I've met the fate
That I dreaded early and late.
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Life for me has become grim.
I have been forsaken by him
On whose faith I did rely.
Mary, our Lady, hear me cry!
Pray for my children and for me,
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Keep us from starving in misery.
Hapless woman, what is thy dole?
I must sully body and soul
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aant.With sinful deeds that I dread.
Lady Mary, stand me in stead.
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Though I could work the spinning wheel,
Yet my labor would not yield
In two weeks a loaf of bread.
I must needs go in stead
Outside town to a lonely spot
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And with my body earn somewhat
That will buy me food for three.
It would be impossible for me
To abandon my little twins.’
Thus her life of sin begins.
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For it is truly told of her
That she the length of seven year
As a common whore went wandering.
She succumbed to many a sin,
Much to her own disgust,
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Which she committed without lust.
Her pleasure in it was but slight.
She did it for a paltry mite
To keep alive her little sons.
It's better that my story shuns
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The sins so heavy and depraved
In which for fourteen years she lived.
But never she neglected, though,
Were she in sorrow or in woe,
To read each day faithfully
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The seven hours of Our Lady.
Those she read in Her honor and praise
That She might remedy her and raise
Out of that life of sin
Under the load of wich she had been
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During fourteen years all told.
It is all truth that I unfold.
She was with him for seven year
Who two sons begot on her
And left her in misery,
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aant.Suffering great adversity.
Ye've heard of the first seven years.
Hear now how she thereafter fares.
Then those fourteen years were past,
God sent into her heart at last
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Remorse so great that she said,
She would rather have her head
Cut off with a naked sword
Than to have sinned any more
With her body as was her way.
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She would weep night and day
So that her eyes were seldom dry.
‘Mary, who suckled God,’ she would sigh,
‘Fountain, above all women pure,
Let me not in need endure.
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Be my witness, Mother of God,
That I rue the path I've trod,
And loathe my sins one and all.
There were so many, I can't recall
Where I did them and with whom.
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Alas, what shall be my doom?
God turns from me His eyes away.
I well may dread the judgment day
When all sins shall come out,
Both of rich and poor, no doubt,
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And all misdeeds be avenged,
Unless the sinners have been cleansed
By shrift, and have done penitence.
That I know too well. And hence,
I am living in great dread.
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Though every day I wore a shred
And crept in it on all fours
From town to town by people's doors,
Barefoot, without shoes,
It would not be of any use,
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It would not make me free of sin,
Unless Thou helpest make me clean.
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aant.Fountain above all virtue pure,
Thou oft hast gladdened rich and poor,
As was in Theophilus manifest.
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He was among sinners the wickedest.
For he delivered body and soul
To Satan, and would have taken dole
From him as vassal from his lord,
Hadst Thou not saved him and restored.
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Though I'm a woman foul with sin,
Whatever the life that I was in,
Lady, remember though that I,
Poor wretch, let never a day go by
Without saying my prayer to Thee.
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Show Thy mercy unto me.
I am one who is sore afraid,
Mary, and one who needeth Thine aid.
My hope is in Thee, for I know,
Thou never letst unrewarded go
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Who greeted Thee and daily prayed
An Ave Maria, merciful maid.
Those who gladly read thy prayer
May be sure that they ne'er
Will be left without reward,
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Chosen bride of our Lord.
For thou likest such loyalty.
Thy son's salutation came to Thee
At Nazareth, when the angel came
With a message in His name
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Such as never messenger brought.
And that is why those same words ought
To be so very dear to Thee,
That Thou givest thanks readily
To him who greeteth Thee therewith.
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Though sins held him in their grip,
Thou wouldst to mercy lead him on
And plead for him before Thy Son.’
Thus did the sinner pray
aant.Pitifully day by day.
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She took a child in either hand
And went wandering through the land
From place to place in poverty
And kept alive by beggary.
Long she wandered here and there
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Till she found the convent where,
Long ago, she had been nun.
Late at night, after the sun
Had set, to a widow's door she came,
And asked for shelter in Jesu name
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Only till the next day.
‘I could not bear to turn thee away
With thy children,’ the widow replied.
‘The little ones look very tired.
Rest yourselves, take a chair.
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I will give you a share
Of what our Lord giveth me
For His mother's sake,’ said she.
Thus they stayed there out of the cold.
She was anxious to be told
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How things in the convent were.
‘Tell me, good woman,’ she said to her,
‘Is this a ladies'nunnery?’
‘Upon my word,’ answered she,
‘A splendid house and very rich.
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There is nowhere another such.
Of all its nuns who wear the veil
I never heard a scandalous tale
Or evil rumor by which the name
Of the convent could come to shame.’
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The young mother, in amaze,
Asked, ‘Art thou sure of this?
I happened to hear people speak
About one of the nuns last week.
I was given to understand
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That she did duty as sacristan.
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aant.He was no liar who told me so.
It happened fourteen years ago
That the nun ran away.
Whither she fled none can say,
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Nor in what country she died.’
Angrily the widow replied,
‘Thou ravest! I warn thee, don't go around
Telling that story without ground
Of the sacristan. Tell it once more,
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And out thou goest, there is the door.
She has been here sacristan
Fourteen years, and no one can
Remember that she failed one day
In all that time to serve and pray
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At matins, unless sickness prevented her.
He were worse than a cur
Who spoke of her otherwise than well.
She is such a stainless damosel
As any nun might wish to be.
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Search in every nunnery
Between the Elbe and the Gironde,
You would not find a nun more fond
Of the spiritual life in God.’
These words sounded strangely odd
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To her who all that time had erred.
She said, ‘Woman, one other word:
What was her mother and father's name?’
She gave them, and they were the same.
Then she knew, herself was meant.
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O God, how sad a night she spent
Secretly by her bed's head.
‘Heartfelt remorse,’ she said,
‘Is all I can offer for my release.
Our Lady, Mary, give me peace.
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My sins make me suffer so.
If I saw an oven aglow
And burn so fiercely that the flame
aant.Lept from its mouth, I'd all the same
Creep into it readily,
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If I could burn my sins off me.
Lord, Thou hast condemned despair.
That gives me comfort in my care.
I still may hope for mercy, God,
Albeit that I feel the prod
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Of sharp anxiety and fear.
There never was sinner since Thou here
Camest down among mankind
And letst Thyself be confined
In human shape and nailed on cross
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Who was not saved from utter loss
If he remorsefully mercy asked;
Though he came late, it was given at last.
That was clearly shown to one
Of the two thieves who hung upon
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The cross to the right of Thee.
That is a comfort, Lord, to me
That Thou receivedst him unchastized.
By good remorse all wrong's revised.
By him Thou madest that clear to me.
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Thou spokest, “Today, I say unto thee,
Shalt thou be with me in paradise.
Verily, it shall not be otherwise.”
It is well known that at last
This malefactor Gisemast
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Prayed for mercy to Thee, o Lord,
And gave Thee neither gold nor hoard
But only remorse for his sins.
We can no more, by any means,
Plumb Thy mercy than we may
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Scoop out the sea in one day
And dry it down to the ground.
Such great sin was never found
That found not greater mercy in Thee.
How then could I repulsed be,
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aant.Lady, from Thy compassionateness
If, contrite, I my sins confess?’
As she thus lay and prayed
She felt a drowsines invade
All her limbs, and fell in a doze.
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And in her sleep a vision arose
That called her name and clearly said,
Where she lay asleep in bed:
‘Woman, thou hast cried so long
That Mary takes pity on thy wrong.
675[regelnummer]
Our Lady has interceded for thee.
Go to the cloister immediately.
Thou findest the door open wide
That let thee out that eventide
When the youth took thee away,
680[regelnummer]
The lover who left thee in dismay.
Thou shalt find again thy veil
Lying by the altar rail.
Put it on, it is yours,
Not only veil, but cowl and shoes.
685[regelnummer]
Gladly thank our Lady for these.
The sacristan's bunch of keys,
Which thou didst hang in the night
Of thine escape within sight
Before the image, she took care
690[regelnummer]
Of those that none became aware,
In fourteen years, that thou wert gone,
So that thy flight was known to none.
Mary has been thy good friend.
To all thy duties she did attend
695[regelnummer]
Wholly in thy similitude.
The Lady of heaven has been good
To thee, poor sinner, serving thy part.
She commands thee to go cloisterward.
Thou shalt find none upon thy bed.
700[regelnummer]
God made me speak the words I said.’
Not long after she awoke,
aant.Startled by what the vision spoke.
She said, ‘God, Lord of might,
Do not grant the devil the right
705[regelnummer]
To bring me in yet greater woe
Than he did years ago.
If I entered the nunnery
And they caught me for thievery,
I should be ashamed even more
710[regelnummer]
Than when I stole away before.
I beg of thee, merciful Lord,
By the precious blood that poured
Out of Thy wounded side:
Unless the voice that called me lied
715[regelnummer]
And came only to do me wrong,
Let it not fail to come along
A second time and yet again
A third, that I may hear it plain
And need not doubt that I may
720[regelnummer]
Return to the convent there to stay,
And to our Lady I shall give
Praise and laud as long as I live.’
The next night - attend and hear -
She heard again a voice appear
725[regelnummer]
And call to her and clearly say:
‘Woman, too long thou doest delay.
Go, return to the nunnery.
God will surely comfort thee.
Mary commandeth thee. Obey.
730[regelnummer]
She sent me. Doubt it not, I pray.’
Now a second time she has heard
The voice that in her dream occurred
And said she should to the cloister go.
She dared not make the journey, though.
735[regelnummer]
The third night she would await,
Saying, is it the devil's bait
That has shown itself to me,
Then let me shatter easily
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[pagina 64]
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aant.Satan's power and his might;
740[regelnummer]
And if he cometh back tonight,
Lord, do confound him so
That he out of doors must go
Ere he can do me injury.
Mary, lend Thy aid to me.
745[regelnummer]
If it was Thou who sent me word
Through the voice that I heard,
I beg Thee, Lady, by Jesus'pain,
Send it to me yet once again.’
She stayed awake the third night.
750[regelnummer]
A voice came from God's might
In a glory of light and said:
‘Thou doest wrong by staying, instead
Of doing what I commanded thee.
For Mary sent thee word by me.
755[regelnummer]
Tarry not till it is too late.
Go to the cloister, don't hesitate.
Thou wilt find a wide-open door.
Go wherever thou wilt, yea, more:
Thou shalt find thy shoes and veil
760[regelnummer]
Lying by the altar's rail.’
When the voice thus had said,
The sinner lying there in bed
Could see the brilliance not too well.
She aid: ‘These words at last dispel
765[regelnummer]
My doubt. They came from heaven above
And are a message of Mary's love.
I need not fear deceit. I know,
Heavenly light was in that glow.
Now I will not hesitate
770[regelnummer]
But go through the cloister gate
And put my trust fully in Her
Who bore our blessed Saviour,
And recommend my little twins
To our Father's benevolence.
775[regelnummer]
He will guard them on their way.’
aant.Then she doffed without delay
Her clothes, which she gently spread,
So as not to wake them, over their bed.
She kissed them both upon their mouths
780[regelnummer]
And said: ‘Keep well, my little flowers.
Through our Lady's benevolence
I leave you here in confidence.
If Mary had not won me grace,
I would not leave you in this place
785[regelnummer]
For all the wealth that Rome has amassed.’
Listen how she recovered her past.
When she went with many a moan
To the cloister all alone,
She entered the orchard and straightway hied
790[regelnummer]
To the door and found it open wide.
She passed through unafraid.
‘I thank Thee, Mary, blessed Maid.
I am back in the convent, back indeed!
May God give me now good speed.’
795[regelnummer]
She found the door, wherever she went,
Open wide by clear intent.
Into the church she found her way
And there she silently did say:
‘God, do grant me my orison
800[regelnummer]
That I may put my habit on,
Which, fourteen years ago, I laid
On the altar of the blessed Maid
When in the night I went away.’
I swear to the truth of what I say.
805[regelnummer]
This is not an old wives'tale:
She found her shoes, cowl and veil
Back again where, years before,
She left them on the altar floor.
She donned them without wavering,
810[regelnummer]
Saying, God, heaven's King,
And our Lady, glorious Maid,
I thank you both for your aid.
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[pagina 65]
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aant.Mary, Thou art virtue's flower.
Thou borest in a painless hour
815[regelnummer]
A son in pure virginity
Who shall be Lord eternally.
Thou art a chosen vessel of worth.
Thy child made heaven and earth.
This power was given Thee from God's hand
820[regelnummer]
And is for ever at Thy command.
Jesus Christ, who is our brother,
Taketh His orders from Thee His mother,
And He may call Thee daughter dear.
That's why I no longer live in fear.
825[regelnummer]
Whoever to Thee for mercy prayed,
Received it though he long delayed.
Thy help is beyond measure strong.
Though I am in grief, though I did wrong,
It has all been changed by Thee,
830[regelnummer]
So that now I may live happily.
I may bless Thee on good ground.’
The sacristy's bunch of keys she found
Hanging in front of the blessed Maid,
Where she hung them when she fled.
835[regelnummer]
She hung the bunch of keys upon
Her girdle and went to the choir anon.
The lamps were lit there in every nook.
She got for each of the nuns a book
And laid them in place one by one,
840[regelnummer]
As long ago she had often done.
She called to the Virgin Mary and prayed
For release from evil through Her aid
For her and her children left behind
In the widow's house sad in mind.
845[regelnummer]
Meanwhile, in course of time,
The cloister clock began to chime
Whereby one knew it was midnight.
At once she seized the bell rope tight
And tolled matins with so much zeal
850[regelnummer]
aant.That everywhere they heard the peal.
All who in the dortour lay
Came without a moment's delay
Down from the floor above.
They never knew the least hereof.
855[regelnummer]
She never left the convent again,
And lived there without reproach or stain.
The Virgin Mary had served for her
As if the sacristan she were.
Thus was saved the sinner, in praise
860[regelnummer]
Of Mary, to whose honor we raise
Our prayers, the Maid of Paradise,
Who always, in faithful wise,
Aids her friends when they are
Burdened with a load of care.
865[regelnummer]
This damsel of whom I told
Is nun again as of old.
Now I do not mean to forget
Her two children whom she let
Stay with the widow sad of mood.
870[regelnummer]
They had neither money nor food.
I cannot give a true account
Of their sorrow when they found
That in the night their mother had fled.
The widow sat down by their bed.
875[regelnummer]
She took pity on their lot.
‘I will go to the abbess foothot
With these two little ones,’ she spake.
‘God will soften her heart and make
Her willing to help them, I suppose.’
880[regelnummer]
She put on their shoes and clothes
And took them to the nunnery.
‘I'd gladly help them, knew I how.’
She said: ‘Mother superior, see
The need of this orphaned pair.
885[regelnummer]
Their mother left them oppressed by care
In my house during the night.
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[pagina 66]
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aant.Where she went when she took flight
I do not know, whether east or west.
Now the children are distressed.’
890[regelnummer]
The abbess answered her: ‘If thou
Wilt keep them, I will pay the expense.
Thou'lt not regret thy benevolence,
Since their mother left them with thee.
Let them be given charity
895[regelnummer]
Every day for God's sake.
Send us an errand boy to take
Food and drink to them every day.
Tell me their needs and I will pay.’
The widow was very glad
900[regelnummer]
That things turned out as they had.
She took the children into her home
And cared for them as for her own.
The mother who had borne them in pain
And suckled them was happy again
905[regelnummer]
When she knew them sheltered there
In the good woman's care,
Her little children whom she did
Abandon in extreme need.
Henceforth she never knew
910[regelnummer]
An anxious thought for those two.
Herself a holy life she led.
She was in trembling and dread
Many a time, night and day,
For she felt remorse prey
915[regelnummer]
On her heart for her wickedness,
Which she dared not confess
To any one, nor disclose,
Nor recount in verse or prose.
Thereafter came upon a time
920[regelnummer]
An abbot who used to visit them
Once in the course of every year
To ascertain if there were
Any rumor of infamy
aant.That might harm the nunnery.
925[regelnummer]
On the day he visited
The house the sinner knelt and read
Her prayers on the choir floor,
Torn by hesitation, for
The devil tempted her with shame
930[regelnummer]
Lest she should bring her blame
Before the abbot and confess.
While praying thus in distress,
She saw a youth come within sight
And pass by, clad in white.
935[regelnummer]
Upon his arm the youngling had
A naked child that seemed to be dead.
He kept tossing up and caught
Again an apple to disport
The child with his ball game.
940[regelnummer]
The nun saw it, as he came
Past her where she lay and prayed.
‘If thee please, friend,’ she said,
‘And if thou'rt come from God, I pray
By His commandments that thou say,
945[regelnummer]
And not conceal from me why
Doest thou with that apple try
To entertain the little lad,
And in thine arm he's lying dead?
Thy playing helps him not a mite.’
950[regelnummer]
‘True, sister, thou are right.
Of my game he is not aware.
Much nor little does he care.
He does not see or hear, he's dead.
Even so remaineth hid
955[regelnummer]
From God thy praying and thy fast.
It boots thee not a straw. Thou hast
Wasted all thy discipline
Doing penance for thy sin.
Thou art in sin so deep immersed
960[regelnummer]
That God heareth not the first
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[pagina 67]
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aant.Word of thy prayer on high.
I counsel thee, quickly hie
To the abbot and confess
To the father thy wickedness
965[regelnummer]
Fully and without deceit.
Beware of the devil; he's a cheat.
The abbot will absolve thee
From thy sins. But verily,
If thou wilt not make them known,
970[regelnummer]
God will make thee atone.’
The youth vanished from her view.
He would not show himself anew.
She understood the words he spoke.
As soon as the morning broke
975[regelnummer]
She went to the abbot and implored
The father to hear her word for word
Confess her sins. He was discreet.
He said: ‘Daughter dear, it's meet
For me to hear what thou shalt say.
980[regelnummer]
Consider well and survey
The full extent of thy sins.’
She went and sat without a wince
By the holy abbot's side,
And bared to him the full tide
985[regelnummer]
Of her life from the start:
How mad love tempted her heart
With such irresistible might
That she had to leave one night
Her nun's habit, much afraid,
990[regelnummer]
On the altar of the Holy Maid
And absconded with a man, Godwot,
Who two children on her begot.
All that ever happened to her
She confessed without demur.
995[regelnummer]
To the abbot she did impart
All that she knew in her inmost heart.
When her shrift had been made,
aant.The holy father, the abbot, said:
‘I shall absolve thee, daugther dear,
1000[regelnummer]
Of the sins that gave thee fear,
And which thou hast confessed to me.
Praise and benediction be
Given to Mary, mother and maid.’
And upon her head he laid
1005[regelnummer]
His hand and gave her remission of sin.
He said: ‘I will tell thy confession in
A sermon for every one to hear.
And yet, so wisely shall I steer
My discourse that never any disgrace
1010[regelnummer]
Shall evermore in any place
Attach to thy children and to thee.
To hush it up seems wrong to me,
The miracle wrought by Christ our Lord
To enhance His Mother's honor and laud.
1015[regelnummer]
I shall proclaim it in every way.
I hope that many sinners may
Be converted by the story
And spread our dear Lady's glory.’
To the convent he made known,
1020[regelnummer]
Ere he resumed his journey home,
What had happened to a nun,
But they never knew which one.
That remained a mystery.
The abbot left in God's custody.
1025[regelnummer]
He took along with him the nun's
Children, and guarded the little ones.
In grey habit he dressed the two.
Into virtuous men they grew.
Beatrice was their mother's name.
1030[regelnummer]
To God be given laud and fame
And to Mary who gave him suck
And showed this miracle to our luck.
She rescued her from misery.
Let all pray, whoever they be,
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[pagina 68]
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1035[regelnummer]
aant.Who shall hear this miracle read,
That Mary stand in our stead
In the sweet vale where we shall meet
Before the Lord His judgment seat.
Amen!
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